Nobody said it was easy

Single and trying to navigate the world of online dating was never going to be easy.

Dating apps are everywhere and the same faces tend to pop up on them all~including mine!

This particular email made me chuckle when I saw it in my inbox ‘Natalie they meet your expectations ‘.

Expectations? That word has huge meaning ,anyone would think that I am sitting here with a long list of expectations for any suitable male to have to wade through!

Besides that~I’ll be the judge of who meets my expectations thanks very much and trust me it will take more than a photograph and a few typed out words that’s for sure.

Maybe that’s why I’m still single haha.❤x

Proud Mama

In keeping with these crazy times,I’ve just had Ads parents consultation on zoom~it was certainly a little different but as ever it made me emotional.

To hear his teacher say I should be proud of him, brought a tear to my eye.
This parenting lark isn’t easy and it certainly doesn’t come with a handbook.


You just keep plodding on,hoping that you are doing your best.
I’m a proud Mama today and everyday.
Well done my boy.❤x

The girl with the rose tinted glasses.

Do you ever wish you could see yourself through someone elses eyes every now and then?

During a conversation this weekend,  I was told I view the world through ‘rose tinted glasses’ interestingly this is something I have been told before in a few different ways, I don’t feel that’s a bad thing, its true I do try and find positives where I can~although when the hoover decided to throw its entire contents across the landing tonight~positive vibes were definitely failing me!!

I have decided I like the title ‘the girl with the rose tinted glasses’ so I’m claiming that,even though I’m 43yrs old! ❤x

Oops

Picture the scene~you’re in tesco, you bump into someone you dated for a while a few years ago,you have a quick chat and then continue shopping.

As soon as he is out of sight you phone your friend~ she answers and without pausing you say ‘guess who I’ve just bumped into?  you’ll never guess!’

After you’ve been round the houses and establish who it is etc, you find yourself at the self checkout and he is a few people behind you in the queue.

You say to your friend ‘hang on one second, you are on speaker phone’ at the same time as she pipes up  ‘can you still see him, or has he gone?’

With a face that’s burning every shade of red imaginable you are barely able to utter your reply  which is ‘ your on speakerphone and he is standing right next to me!!!!’

Fully aware that the ground wasn’t going to open up and swallow me, I finish packing as quick as I can.

Daring to glance sideways as he calls out ‘bye,nice to see you!!!’

This was almost a year ago but it makes me laugh just thinking about it! ❤ x

Neighbours

Oh my god, he’s behind you!
Honestly I promise you he’s over there.

Yes I know this sounds like a scene from a pantomime but it is infact another dating story for you!
Based on pre~covid true events…..



You two are not funny I said laughing along at their grinning faces.

We were sat in our local pub, waiting for dinner to arrive (those were the days!)
and having a catch up. Obviously the conversation had swiftly turned to one of our  favourite topics ~dating.

So I was chatting to this guy earlier, he seemed quite nice ‘he asked me out for a drink tonight’ ‘nothing like short notice hey’ says Sally ‘ oh I know, I said I was meeting you guys and maybe another time etc’
‘Ooh really, where is he from, how old is he and what does he look like?’ pipes up Emily.
‘Well he is local, not sure where exactly,  he is 42yrs old, hang on I’ll show you’.

The girls took my phone, had a good look at him and his profile before handing it back to me.

Then roughly 5 minutes later they both nearly fell off of  their chairs and proclaimed that he was standing at the bar!!!

‘If you don’t believe us,have a look for yourself’ says Sally.

I turn round slowly and cannot quite believe that they aren’t winding me up.

After much giggling, we ate our food and decided to leave the pub, much to the girls amusement and my embarrassment we had to walk passed him and his friends to get out.
I had decided on discretely leaving but
Emily decided that wasn’t an option and dropped my name loudly into conversation as we walked past, laughing like a group of teenagers.

Once I got home, I sent him a quick message asking if he had enjoyed his evening and apologising for any awkwardness.

He was somewhat confused as to why it would of been awkward~I said I didn’t come and say hi as we were both out with friends etc.

‘I’m not sure what you mean, I was just down the road at my local ‘he said.

‘Yes I was in there too, I wasn’t sure if you had seen me or indeed heard my friends dropping my name loudly into conversation hee hee ‘.

‘Oh where you sitting over in the corner?’

‘Yes that’s right ‘ I said.

‘Aha yes, I saw someone with blonde hair is that you?’

At this point I wasn’t quite sure what to say as in my profile picture I quite clearly have dark hair~enough said!


‘Do you go to that pub often?’ He asked.

‘Now and then’ I replied.

‘I like it in there, its nice and easy to walk to from home ‘

‘Always handy when you can walk/stumble home after a night out hee hee’ I said.

‘Yes for sure, I live down Smith Avenue, so its not far at all’

‘Smith avenue??’ I ask, if I thought this night couldn’t have any more surprises then I was totally wrong.

‘Yes I don’t know if you know it? I’ve lived here for about 3years now’ .

‘Oh yes I know it very well’ I reply, trying to ascertain if this was some kind of a wind up.

‘Oh right~whereabouts are you then?’he asks.

‘I’m at home in Smith Avenue!’ Comes my  reply laughing to myself,thinking we couldn’t of made this up if we tried.

❤x



Conclusion~it turned out that he lived about 4 doors down from me on the opposite side of the road, our paths had never knowingly crossed before and although we kept in touch, we never did go out for that drink!

Dating disasters continued…

Hannah took a deep breath and said ‘ok, here is what really happened…..

After work I went home,got out the outfit I thought I might wear, had a bath then decided to try said outfit on.

Obviously I decided I didn’t want to wear that, so basically emptied out my whole entire wardrobe all over my bed.

I then tried on approximately 6 different tops and ended up wearing my first choice naturally!

By now time was getting on so I dried my hair and did my make up.

I was really pushed for time but being my ever optimistic self I decided I was going to put some false nails on, easier said than done when your rushing and you’ve got more glue on your skin than on your nails, but once I had started I had to finish.

So the nails were finally on, I was about 10 minutes late leaving than I had planned but thought I might just make it, however just as I opened the front door a nail pinged off,I ran upstairs to stick it back on but couldn’t open the glue.

For reasons best known to myself (definitely do not try this at home) I opened the glue with my mouth~carefully trying not to smudge my lipstick as I did so.
Smudging my lipstick was the least of my worries as I ended up with glue in my mouth, I thought I had removed it all but then spent the next 25 minutes of my journey trying to pick the remaining glue out of my tooth!

By the time I pulled up and parked I was 30 mins late~so jumped/tripped out of the car, trying to hurry to the door of the pub, when my heel broke on my shoe, thinking nothing else could surely go wrong I stumbled into the pub and scanned the room for my date~ who I have to say looked rather different to his profile picture which he later admitted was about 8yrs old.

Anyhow we chatted for about half an hour~he then asked what my plans where for the rest of the eve as he was going home to watch a film!!

So ok then I took that as a subtle hint that the quickest date I’ve ever been on was over and tried my best to stay upright on my broken shoe whilst we walked to the car.

Having got home to the mess which easily resembled a break in~ with clothes,make up and sodding nail glue shrewn everywhere I was very surprised that he text and asked me if I wanted to see him again.’

Hannah finally paused for breath and took a moment to study Sally’s face which at this precise moment had mascara running down it whilst she dabbed at her tears of laughter, unable to save her make up thus rubbing black across her cheeks.

Sally opened her mouth to reply but got an attack of the giggles again~’its the nail glue stuck in your tooth that’s got me hahaha!’

Through the fits of laughter came a deep male voice, Hannah looked up to see the nice looking waiter stood by their table.

I’m so sorry to interrupt but I couldn’t help but over hear and I just have to know about that text~are you meeting him again?

Hannah blushed about 20 shades of red and mumbled’ no I’ve decided not to.
Which leads me to my next dilemma~what shall I reply?!’
❤x

Dating Disasters..

‘So~how was it?
I want to hear all about it!’

Hannah was sitting in front of her friend nursing her second coffee of the morning.
Well she began it went something like this….

‘I rushed home from work, was super organised and had already sorted my outfit~even down to the shoes and handbag!’

‘After a quick shower~ hair and make~up done, I was ready to leave.
I decided to put some false nails on and that new lipstick I brought last Saturday when we were in town, do you remember?’

‘Oh yes Sally replied ‘the dark red one,you said you thought it might be too dark for your skin tone but well sod it, you brought it anyway saying and I quote ‘ its about time I tried something a bit more adventurous’.

Hmm that’s right Hannah mused~swirling her spoon around in the hot coffee,watching the ripples it was making. Followed by me saying ‘ life doesn’t get much more adventurous than trying online dating whilst hanging on to my thirties for dear life!’

‘Anyhow’I snap back into the room,stop stirring my coffee and continue..

‘I arrived 5 minutes early, I was nervous but I really shouldn’t of been, he looked exactly like his profile picture, we had loads in common and laughed and chatted all night. He text me when I got home and asked me if I would like to go for dinner on Saturday night.’

‘Obviously I said yes and now you need to help me decide what to wear for date number 2.’

Sally’s eyes were wide open, looking incredulously at me across the table.

‘What’s that face for I asked?’Is it that unbelievable that someone would want a second date with me??’

‘No of course not,don’t be daft I just can’t get over the fact that

a). you were on time and

b). You have agreed to go for dinner with him.’

Try as I might,I just couldn’t hold the laughter in anymore, my coffee went down the wrong way and my eyes filled with tears and the effort of trying to regain my composure in the middle of a packed coffee shop (where it has to be said one or two of the baristas may of caught my eye on arrival).

Finally I pulled myself together and said ‘sorry I just couldn’t resist, the date went nothing like that at all.
Let me get another coffee and I’ll start from the beginning…….

To be continued tomorrow.❤x

Life is a roller coaster…

So here I am aged 43yrs feeling quite frankly like an old version of my teenage self complete with horrible hormones, mood swings and everything in between.

I am embarking on a new journey which is apparently called ‘the menopause’ thats the medical term for it, I could offer my own name for it but it probably wouldn’t be very polite!

Yes it’s finally happening my body is basically going full circle in its stages of life and after having a hysterectomy (5 years ago now) it has decided to grace me with the following joys


*hot sweats
*increased insomnia~who knew that was even possible!
*a full range of extensive hormones which could hands down rival my teenage daughters any day of the week!

I could go on but I won’t spoil it for you hehe.

Something that has definitely got worse (and yes I admit this has never been my strong point )
Is the ability to concentrate and indeed remember~well hardly anything at all.

For example~Thursday evening whilst I thought the gammon joint I was preparing for dinner was cooking nicely in the oven, you can imagine my surprise when I opened the oven to find myself looking at an empty roasting tin!

I kid you not my first response was ‘where on earth has the meat disappeared to’.

Realising that it couldn’t of simply vanished from the oven~I scanned the kitchen to find it sitting on top of the oven waiting to be cooked.

I wish I could say these things didn’t happen to me on a daily basis but sadly that would be lying.

Anyhow I’m off to try and get some adulting done~and if you haven’t already seen my top tip of trying to mend your ripped top 2 mins before you are meant to be leaving the house then do be aware that strong glue isn’t the answer!

Happy Saturday everyone .
❤ x